Heal, empower, transform.

Personal experiences changes the trajectory on our path…

I spent my life surrounded by a family and culture that sweeps death and loss under the rug…allows tiny speckles of emotion…lingers in clouds of tears and overwhelm. We never spoke about death, or dying, or loss. No, instead, we guillotined the departed and never spoke of them again. Happy memories, joy, laughter were “too much” to be witnessed and held. Living death was fueled by anger and resentment, misunderstood, and lingering…thrown into the caves of the underworld, never to be whispered of again. Culturally, systemically, it was the same. Easier to numb, avoid, pretend it does not exist than to succumb to the boogie man. 

As a teenager, I was fascinated and completely in awe of death rituals and ceremonies rooted in Ancient Egyptian culture…practices of indigenous tribes around the world… mystical and occult practices of witnessing, honoring, and holding space for those we mourn (dead, living, parts of our own selves). Still, it was challenging to apply in my personal life. In my early 20s a life altering incident occurred- I lost someone I deeply cared for suddenly. I never had a chance to say goodbye and felt a portal within myself shut tightly. It was too difficult to let her name slip off my lips… to access the sad, the happy, the joyful moments we shared. Every time, I did, the door sealed shut even more. I held space for others, brought empathy and compassionate witnessing and encouraged them to honor and embrace their losses while nourishing their personal growth, amplifying their strength and empowerment, and finding meaning from their descent journey.  For years, I found myself glossing over my own relationship with death, grief and loss. 

In my 30s, suddenly, this escapism, hyperfocus on others so that I can distract from my own grief work no longer worked. I was thrown into the belly (literally and figuratively) by experiencing pregnancy loss. This led to a spiral of distrust of the body, shame and guilt, and even questioning aspects of my spirituality- which has always been my guiding light throughout my life. There, deep within the belly, how I longed for a community to hold me…to witness with me...to collectively cradle me while I wept… to remind me how it feels when you find your nose peering out from the descend journey and the light beams down and shows you the path. When I wiggled out and gave the gift of insight to myself, I realized how many others have experienced pregnancy/fertility loss. I started to listen more…to hear their stories and hold a lantern for them as they walk through the trenches of the deepest, darkest, shadows of descend. I knew that part of my purpose is to hold space and create a communal process with grief and loss…to help build a relationship and acceptance with it, in order to strengthen, empower, and become a new Self. 

Sisters, we should not travel this journey alone. 

Allow me to guide you through the darkness so that you can connect with your light. 

In deepest gratitude for you to step forth on this journey,

Liana